Fathers, Sons, and Stereotypes

So I have two little (well, in one case, getting not-so-little) daughters, who are made of awesome and win, and life is good.

But it’s not all good. It’s specifically not all good when we come to the topic of sons, or my lack thereof.

When I had one daughter, all was bliss. But after I had a second, Questions came. Pointed questions about whether there might be another child, specifically a boy, sometimes with all the finesse of this guy:

“And may their first child be a masculine one.”

Sometimes people weren’t this blatant, of course. Sometimes it’s merely a palpable air of “poor you”. But here’s a funny thing; when we think about the stereotypes of cultures associated with this kind of view, what do we think of? Because here’s the thing: being in IT I work with a shit-tonne of Indian Kiwis and Indian immigrants. Being a fan of kebabs I’ve been a regular at a couple of different shops long enough to be on “long chat at the counter” terms with the staff1. And that’s never been part of the conversation, explicit or implicit. It’s always been with white Kiwis.

  1. Which is wellington usually doesn’t mean Turkish - it means Assyrian, Syrian, Iraqi. ↩︎